It's OK!

Tonight's post is something many people don't like to talk about - well for me anyway. Everyone has day's when they feel down, when they don't want to get out of bed, they don't want to see anyone. Just generally can't be bothered with life, I guess. It's important to remember we are only human, we can't be happy and full of life everyday- can you imagine how exhausting that would be!? It's normal to feel fed up with life. You're definitely not alone and never will be.

For some people this stops at "simply having a down day" but for others down days is all they know- depression. It's a very touchy subject to discuss, however, I feel it's important to talk about. Especially for people who have it severely and need some reassurance. I, luckily, don't suffer from severe depression and I wouldn't class myself as having depression to anyone. In saying this, I do still go through days, sometimes even weeks, of feeling depressed and that's OK. I don't suffer severely, however, I have many close friends who do, and from personal experience I know how horrible it is to have it- even for a short amount of time. 

People seem to categorise depression as something stuck to you constantly. There's this crazy idea that if you're not depressed all the time you can't EVER be depressed. Well this is just stupid isn't it? Yes, you may not be down all the time and yes you may not be medically written down as having depression. However, this does not make you any less important than someone who is suffering daily. 

People get scared to speak out, talk to their friends, confess they're feeling depressed. People are scared because they will be told "Get over it" or "You're only having a bad day." The truth is, we don't know anyone's situation. We don't know what may have triggered someone to feel like that; to feel worthless, hopeless, empty. People who suffer both daily and have waves of depression all fall under the same bracket. They all feel the same. Whether it be temporarily, or for a long time. 

Not everyone deals with it the same either. Some prefer to shut everyone out and take time alone, and that's OK. Some people want to be around friends and family and seek reassurance and that's also OK. Some just want a mixture of both, they can't make up their mind, they talk to someone one day and not the next... That's also OK. Be proud of yourself for the little things. Be proud of yourself for even getting out of bed, even if you don't reach beyond the doorstep. Be proud of yourself for eating something, you're looking after your body! But more than anything else be proud of yourself for sticking around another day, that's what real courage is. You got past today, you can get past tomorrow.  

Next time you judge someone, if they tell you they are feeling "depressed" don't belittle them to the point they feel it is invalid, that they're invalid. All you are doing is heightening what they already feel and making them worse. They are speaking out in confidence. It is not something easy to do; they are looking for help. As a friend, co-worker, family member or anything in-between... be there for them! And for anyone suffering in silence always know you're not alone. There are people suffering with the same demons, people always willing to talk. However, know that it's OK to be quiet too... I understand! there's no pressure, but there's always ears to listen. 

If anyone feels like they would take comfort in messaging me I am always here to talk to people. You got this.


Tasha Hall x x x

" A New World " - monologue

“a new world”

“This is it, there is no turning back now; the skyscrapers shadow my figure dragging me into a new atmosphere, a new world. I am not in my familiar surroundings anymore. Unable to keep my mind steady, I long to be back amongst my own kind. Stuck in amongst the dirt and grime of the city, I question where I now inhabit. Freedom, change and new beginnings. This is what I always wanted but the overhanging fear of a new life ahead engulfs my sanity.

The stench of staleness rushes through my nostrils as I wander down the haunting alleyways, broken glass bottles of substances unbeknown to me are scattered on the ground like the stars spread across the sky by the familiar galaxies. How do these humans survive in this atmosphere? A chaotic environment; chanting and screaming sends my head spinning, I am not used to this noise like these humans are. I did not expect it to be like this:  perhaps I expected too much. Perhaps my hopes were too high for this world. I imagined happy, peaceful, joyful surroundings but life down here is perhaps not the same as life back home: for it appears life is much darker, colder and more mysterious down here.

I feel like I stick out amongst the crowds of people like a sore thumb, as I have heard the humans say, hiding my figure with the cape I brought with me, but I cannot hide my face. My slit-like eyes and pinpoint head seem to be rather alien to these humans; they have strange round heads and big round eyes – it is the strangest sight I have ever seen.

My legs buckle beneath me as I strain to keep on walking under the weight of this atmosphere. The sights around me, ugly and dull, they are not getting any brighter; the sun set long ago and the moon is at its apex. Booming sounds echo through the buildings, flashing lights seep into my eyes as I watch hysterical humans with strange coloured hair. Dressed in the most peculiar outfits they flee through the streets like wild animals. Oh, how I long to go home.

I find a quiet street somewhere away from all the hustle and bustle and I lie down in an alleyway nearby. I am filled with nostalgia while I think of home; my people, the atmosphere and the comfort of my own surroundings.

The sun is rising; the noise is fading into nothing; it must be safe now to continue my journey. At this point, I am no longer sure I wish to pursue it.

***

I am home now, there is no more waiting. My companions greet me with excitement as they eagerly await to hear the stories from planet earth; sadly, I do not have anything exciting to tell. Life is strange as an alien, it can be lonely. However, sometimes it takes an eye-opening experience to realise there is no place like home.

face make-up must haves

Everyone who knows me is aware that I own a little too much make-up, however, I am definitely ok with that. I used to be so stingy with brands and always wore the cheapest make-up but sadly my taste has escalated on the more pricey side. In saying that however a lot of make-up favourites I have are really affordable and I genuinely prefer them to some of the higher end market. I thought with it being just after Christmas and people looking to spend their money; what would be a more perfect opportunity to share some of my favourites with you all! From foundation to highlighters these are my favourite face products.

NARS Sheer Glow Foundation £31 

I got given this Foundation at Christmas as I was dying to try it out and I have heard so many amazing things about NARS. I am one of those people who find it really difficult experimenting with foundation once they find one they like so this was a big step. I normally use MAC Studio Fix Foundation however I feel sometimes it's too heavy. NARS Foundation was my answer! It's coverage is full, however, it is very buildable. It is so light on your skin it genuinely feels like you've nothing on- they definitely didn't label it "weightless" for nothing. It's so smooth and not "cakey" at all which I find MAC can be if you over-use it. You can use a light layer for a natural look or apply more for fuller coverage. This Foundation is very much flexible and I absolutely love it, I would definitely grab for this foundation more than a MAC one now. I got the shade "Deauville" which is for pink/yellow undertones. It is suited to all skin types which is a bonus- Retailing at around £31 it is definitely on the more pricey side but I would consider it worth it. 

Rimmel London Match Perfection Foundation £7.99

I have used this foundation for as long as I can remember. This is a great foundation for a cheaper option to the NARS one above if you don't want to splash cash but are looking for a good quality foundation; it is also buildable and provides great coverage. I quite happily wore this for years before I decided to experiment and I still use this now daily unless I am going to an event or somewhere I want my make-up to last longer. This foundation, again, is so weightless and light to apply to your skin. It feels so smooth and you feel like you don't have too much make-up on. The only downside to the foundation is that it doesn't last as long, however, I wouldn't consider that a downside really considering It's more than three times cheaper. In saying that It still lasts a good amount of time through the day and I definitely recommend this one to all. Retailing at £7.99 in most stores and some stores including Savers retailing the product at even less this is a beauty must have! A very good foundation for those who have slightly dry/combination skin. 

Collection Concealer £4.19

This concealer gets raved about so much! and for very good reason; It is amazing! I honestly have only ever purchased this and one other concealer throughout my years of using make-up and this is the one I always reach for first. It is so unbelievably cheap retailing at under £5 it is definitely a bargain. I have always suffered from really dark/baggy eyes and this is the only product I have found to mask it well. It is available in three shades and I always get the lightest (01) for extra brightening. It is amazing high-coverage and quality. You do not need to build the product up either so it lasts a lot longer than expected; a little goes a long way.

 Laura Geller Baked Gelato Swirl Illuminator (Ballerina) £21

This is my favourite highlighter EVER. I only own this in the one shade though at the moment (Ballerina) and it is honestly so amazing. It is a powder highlighter but the texture is so smooth and creamy that is almost feels like a cream highlighter; it blends amazingly and the lasting power of this is so good. The shade "Ballerina" is a lovely dusky rose-gold and I especially love wearing this one on a night out- It's definitely my special "go to" night out essential. The pink sparkly shimmer just completes an outfit. 

MUA Highlight Shimmer Stick £4

This MUA highlighting stick is a fab buy if you don't want to spend as much on the likes of the Laura Geller one above. I had ran out of highlighter and picked this up completely randomly thinking "oh this will do for now" and now I use this daily. My Laura Geller one I prefer to save for special occasions so I use this one more often. It is a cream textured highlighter which is risky for me because I was so used to using powdered formula's. It is in a very light golden shade although all it appears is shimmery on the cheeks. It is so pigmented it is unbelievable; I find it really easy to blend and a little of this goes a long way. I don't find myself having to pack layer upon layer- one swipe on my cheeks and it's glowing. I do find I need to apply this more than once throughout the day, however, at £4 who can complain!? I am currently on my fourth stick of this and I will gladly go onto a fifth. Definitely check this one out! 

NYX Contour & Highlight Pro Palette £18

This palette got recommended to me by a friend. I wasn't so sure on contouring/highlighting so it was all quite new to me and I wanted to ensure I got a good product to try it with and I wasn't let down. The palette is very versatile with the shades so it would suit most skin tones, however, the contour shades are fairly dark and although I am pale myself if i was a couple of shades paler then this palette may be too dark. Everything is workable though and because they easily blend in I would say it is suited to anyone. The powders are very pigmented which is great, the highlighters also are very pigmented as well- although I don't really use them as much. They are all matte shades which suits me perfectly and I just find this palette to be very affordable and It's my favourite contouring make-up I have found so far. I don't find i need to re-apply throughout the day with this product unless I am doing something hectic- so that is a bonus!

Tasha Hall x x x 

Trip home for Christmas

I hope everyone had an amazing Christmas and New Year! I certainly over-indulged over Christmas on my trip home, however, sadly I was tucked up in bed new years night with the flu. I brought in the bells with Craig though so I couldn't of asked better company. I spent Christmas at home for ten days; it was short and sweet but it gave me enough time to see all my friends and family and that's what really matters at the end of the day.

The journey up was crazy! of course with everyone travelling back and fourth for the festivities it was chaos- I took the train up and let's just say I was very very glad to get off at the other end! It was so nice to see everyone after it feeling like SO long It just makes you appreciate the time you spend with loved ones even more.

Anyone that knows me knows I don't pack lightly, a suitcase would probably do me for one nights stay so I was pretty heavy packed. It was so nice getting home and having all the home comforts back. Having someone else cook you food 24/7 and not having to worry about buying in food was such a joy. The best part of home comforts was without a doubt a bath!!!! I am crazy on baths and living in halls definitely has made me realise even more that I have an obsession. I miss my baths so much and, honestly, I came out like a prune every single time- I just didn't want to get out! The only thing missing was some Lush bath bombs which I didn't manage to cram in my bag but I won't forget next time no way. My Gran had susprised me with new Santa bed sheets and I honestly think she was a bit overly excited about it all. It was so adorable though! she knows me too well, I will never really grow up. It was definitely a guilty pleasure "Yeah they're cool" when secretly I absolutely loved them and I felt like a massive kid on Christmas Eve all over again.

My Christmas day was a quiet one, it usually is. Just me, my Mum and my Gran. It's nice though and not completely hectic and stressful. I spent the day with them and went down to visit my Niece and Nephews to see what Santa brought them! There's something so special and sweet about kids faces on Christmas day that makes it even more magical. I'd asked for money for Christmas so I didn't have that many presents to unwrap, I did however get some: Perfume (lady million of course- staple for me!), lovely bath stuff, face things and new make up which I was all delighted with just to mention a few. Christmas to me though is not about  the amount of presents, money or gifts- although It's obviously a bonus! It's just such a nice atmosphere and you appreciate everyone and everything around you that little bit more. I genuinely mean when I say the Christmas dinner is my favourite part, I wait all year for those pigs in blankets! all drenched in gravy just the way I like it YUM.

I was working a lot of hours whilst home which I'm really glad for as extra money is always appreciated but it meant not seeing people as much as I would have liked. Of course I managed to squeeze in a night out with all my favourite girlie's in the world! It's so hard these days with us all growing up trying to find a time everyone is free. There's always either work commitments, family commitments or everyone is just busy! With some of us not living at home now either it makes it so much harder. Boxing Day was definitely the day everyone had to go out and It was honestly such a great night, I hadn't seen some of the girls in months so It was so nice to have us all back together again. 

It was strange not having Craig there to celebrate Christmas with me too. It would have been amazing to celebrate our first Christmas in the same place! four hours away made it even more shitty. People laugh when others are missing someone over the Christmas period- It's only ten days after all they say! However Christmas is such a special time and going from practically living with him to leaving him behind on our first Christmas together was pretty rubbish. I definitely missed that happy face a lot but it made me appreciate the time so much more. He had sent me a surprise package of flowers, a teddy and chocolates on the lead up to Christmas and it really was the most thoughtful thing. I really am a lucky person and I couldn't be happier walking into 2017 with him.

Christmas is such an amazing time of year, It's all about love really. You appreciate every single person that little bit more that's in your life and it put's it all into perspective. I am so grateful and thankful for everyone and everything I have in my life, to even be here and have health is more than anyone should ask for at this time of year. That is why (although you celebrate happiness) to think of those that, sadly, aren't with us anymore this Christmas or here for another year. Jamie is always in my thoughts through Christmas and New Year but like always we make him proud and have a ball, It's what he would want. Christmas is a time of happiness and although you can miss people around you, you make the most of it and have an extra glass for them too! Merry Christmas to everyone and a Happy New Year! I wish everyone a magical 2017 and the best of luck for what lies ahead. To friends, family and the angel in the sky. It will always be onwards and upwards.


Tasha Hall x x x